Conflicts

You can not do this? Have you ever look yourself in the mirror, you look fat, ugly, you are not beautiful at all, said, someone. Why don’t you exercise, lose some weight, behave that way, you are a girl, do not do this or do that? You are good for nothing.

Suddenly, she looks around who is saying this to her but no one is seen.

She thought does outer beauty is what that always matter? Why people tend to judge everybody but it is also true, I do not look beautiful at all, far from the society norms, she started feeling depressed again and start eating as eating relieves her stress. She is eating even when she knows she doesn’t have to and this, in turn, causing more depression to her.

Then, came the voice again, don’t listen to her, she doesn’t want you to succeed, you are capable of accomplishing anything you want. Why are you eating this much, you are beautiful, people have to say something, don’t listen to them, everybody, you come across, loves you, don’t you see that, looks don’t matter and why are you torturing yourself please don’t do this to yourself.

Now, she starts becoming more restless, what is happening, is she gone mad, she is actually hearing voices.

These voices are not of people but they are coming from her inner mind. Those are reflections of thoughts that are going in her mind, those two perspectives of society she heard all her life. Nobody asked her, what she wants, everybody want her to become as they like her to see and in this process, she becomes like that, lonely and depressed, who does not love herself or afraid of doing anything, and does not like to talk much and doubt every single person she met and more importantly she lost her true self and she has lost her confidence.

She needs help, but whom to ask, she doesn’t know as sympathy and empathy is different and she does not think anyone can ever understand her or even will try to understand her even once .

---

Today, mental health has become, one serious issue, and we as a society are very much responsible for it. Why it is difficult to accept someone as they are, why we have to judge someone on their looks, ignoring their rest capabilities, and make them feel undesirable. They, start, self-doubting themselves and we lost one another life to depression, and unknowing what we take as a casual remark can actually cause an adverse effect on someone ‘s mind.

THAT ANXIOUS BEING……….

Tsaunami of thoughts run through her head

As high as waves one would expect

Each giving a reason to be afraid even more

Her face turns red , palms sweaty

Skipping heartbeats , sensations of pace

Volcano is about to burst

She can’t sit

She can’t stand

Her body shakes , suffocation she feels

Earthquake inside is at full pace

Burdened with expectations , her mind just freeze

Detached she felt

Fears cribs in

Past to present , present to future

Her procrastination never ends

Personality she wear is not her true self

Her secret self , hidden under layers

Her inner self is screaming

To relax a little bit

Escape to the place , where anxiety does not come in .

©Era singh

Empty souls or empty spaces?

I know , there is lot going on around. This coronavirus is mentally draining everybody and there are many people , for whom this lockdown period is appearing very difficult to pass and most of you must have been finding it very frustrating. You all must be missing meeting friends and relatives, few of you must be stuck in some other city alone away from your family , few must be missing going out like before and I can even say , now many of you must be missing your school and offices and no more want more holidays . But , why to focus on negativity , let us focus on positive aspect of it. There are plenty of things , you can do to keep yourself sane. In this present time , your mental health and physical health both are very important . You can do medication, you can go on your terraces to walk etc. You can again start doing your long lost hobby whatever it is . You can read any novel or any other book of your interest or you can complete watching that series for which you never got time before. You can also learn some new skill like cooking , gardening etc. And also not to forget,our technology is so advanced now you can still chit chat with your friends and relatives . More importantly , you finally got some time to spent with your family you are craving for so long. If you think negative only , you will see only negative . Be positive. Be safe Stay home You don’t even now how many lives you all are saving by staying at home This time too will pass.

WHAT IS MEANING OF YOUR DREAMS ?

According to the famous Austrian neurologist and founder of psychoanalysis , SIGMUND FREUD –

“THE INTERPRETATION OF DREAMS IS THE ROYAL ROAD TO A KNOWLEDGE OF THE UNCONSCIOUS ACTIVITIES OF THE MIND “.

He believed dreams to be conscious expression of the unconscious fantasies or impulses which are not accessible to the individual in wakefulness , there by providing satisfaction by wish fulfilment in dreams .This process is known as dream work. According to this theory , dream work consists of following mechanism :

1. Symbolism – in our dreams , what we see can be the symbolic representation of person , places , our desires , fear , parents , children , death , birth etc . People do see snakes , cats, mountains , rivers , sun, their old house etc are all symbols which may or may not have any significant meaning .
2. Displacement -means dream-distortion, involving a shift of emphasis from important to unimportant things , or the replacement of something by a mere illusion , the  transference  of emotions, ideas, or wishes that can cause anxiety and disturb sleep .
3. Condensation – means multiple thoughts and ideas , displacements in our mind combined and we see them in dream as a single idea and it tend to form a series of association .
4. Projection – it is out of body experiences which we have sometimes during sleep as if soul and body are two different identities or it can happen when the dreamer places their own personal desires and wants onto another person.
5. Secondary elaboration ( Rationalisation) – so as to have an logical thinking in our primary thinking process and to organise an incoherent dream into something much more comprehensible and logical for the dreamer which can be final stage of dream work .

In psychology , projection, displacement , rationalisation are all defense mechanism.

• Psychological projection is a defense mechanism in which the human ego defends itself against unconscious impulses or qualities by denying their existence in themselves while attributing them to others. 
• Displacement is an unconscious defence mechanism whereby the mind substitutes either a new aim or a new object for goals felt in their original form to be dangerous or unacceptable.
• Rationalization or rationalisation is a defense mechanism in which controversial behaviours or feelings are justified and explained in a seemingly rational or logical manner to avoid the true explanation, and are made consciously tolerable—or even admirable and superior—by plausible means. It is also an informal fallacy of reasoning.

so , what actually consist of dream content ? Dream content can be our those unconscious forbidden feelings, wishes or impulse and fantasies which can disturb your sleep and can evoke anxiety which can be mentally distressing . What we see in dreams can be our day to day activities , our experiences , our thinking , our fears , guilt etc . For example , during exam times , many students are so much in stress that they tend to see themselves giving a exam and they fail as they have a fear of failing in a exam and not performing up-to mark . And, on the other hand , few might see themselves scoring good . This is all our dream work .

Most of the time , we do not remember our dreams , sometimes we remember a bits of it and sometimes complete , this is all work of our mind which is working continuously. People tend to see their loved ones , their childhood memories etc in dreams as they are so attached to them and in our unconscious mind these are present . Even , sometimes they tend to see people or places not known to them and sometimes , we tend to see same dream again and again , there are dreams which tend to be very disturbing and confusing that to keep on thinking on it and want to know its meaning. Few people think there is always some hidden message in our dreams which should be interpreted or it can be our inner self which is giving you some indication to focus or start working on it before it get too late .

What we think, experience, our desires etc are all stored in our brain and when we sleep, brain tend to process all the information stored and we tend to see that in our dreams . And , one think which , I always wonder , are our dreams sometimes escape from reality which we do not want to accept ? Is our past life experiences , people or places etc also manifest in our dreams ? Dream interpretation is one thing that always and will always remain the topic of research and learning . And it always amaze me our brain works and would we humans ever be able to know it fully ?